My ultra-personal inner monologue

Archive for the ‘family’ Category

Sunday morning blues

11 March 2007

I’m ever more disillusioned with the church. I realise I’m not the first person ever to feel this way, but I was really trying very hard to enjoy our church. On this beautiful Sunday morning we have some family here. Although not conservative, they are decidedly less liberal than I am, especially when it comes […]

Personal vs career

15 February 2007

Last night Kay made one of those comments that I absolutely love her for. Perhaps I enjoyed the comment just because I want to hear it. But I like to believe I enjoyed it because it’s true. On third thoughts, perhaps I enjoyed it because I want to hear it and it’s true. They’re not […]

Intro vs outro

9 February 2007

‘You have a way with words’ my wife said after defusing an extremely volatile situation with my (sometimes) thoughtless mother-in-law. Since childhood I have been able to influence – manipulate is so unnecessarily negative – the feelings and emotions of my family. Practising on my brother, I was able to make him cry at will. […]

In defense of pen and paper

5 February 2007

The problem with online journalling is that I can’t always write down things as I think of them. Perhaps the old pen-and-paper routine with a little pocketbook has its advantages? To be honest, though, it’s not really a problem of the medium, but rather the environment. I am connected for most of my day. In […]

Children and the wall of China

30 January 2007

From Boswell’s ‘The life of Samuel Johnson’: He [Johnson] expressed a particular enthusiasm with respect to visiting the wall of China. I [Boswell] catched it for a moment, and said I really believed I should go and see the wall of China had I not children, of whom it was my duty to take care. […]

Slightly off centre

21 January 2007

On the train, back from work. It’s 23:44 on a Saturday night and the train leaves in 6 minutes. My travelling companions are drunk, on alcohol, on life, on some other addictive drug. My body is tired and sore, having spent time in the gym. A quick trip into the city to visit the gym. […]

A warning from below

19 January 2007

I woke up to quite a distressing email today. Yes, I have father issues. My father has father issues. It seems to be hereditary, which is partly why I am so relieved at only having daughters. Besides, I work damn hard to consciously do everything in my power to ‘remain their hero’ in all its […]

Religious ambiguity

17 January 2007

Despite my complex upbringing, I find that I’m leaning more and more towards agnosticism. With have a devout Methodist/Anglican/religious orthodox mother and an agnostic/atheist ambiguous father, it’s probably not so surprising. Despite my religious upbringing, I was still raised in a very liberal and open minded house which encouraged doubt and debate. It’s very tough […]

Valuable things

16 January 2007

Oh, the true value of things. Working from home again today afforded me the opportunity to fetch Donna from school. This is her last week of only two full days’ school – next week it’s full day, every day. Despite some threatening clouds I loved walking the bit more than a mile to school, and […]

A dark and stormy night

16 January 2007

What a terrible title for something truly terrifying. Surely this is one of my darkest and most stormy nights. I am always reminded of the honourable Winston Churchill, who referred to his moods as ‘the black dog’. when I am low as I am tonight, I have barely enough energy left to fully appreciate that […]